Embracing Change: A Journey Towards Healing

The part I haven’t shared much this year

I share a lot online, but I’ve kept parts of this year quiet. Last Christmas, I was ready to give up my gym and get a normal job. Not because I don’t love what I do, but because constant stress, financial pressure, and carrying everything alone wears you down. I even spent parts of this year looking for something else. Just wanting my life to feel lighter, more restful.

At the same time, I was dealing with ongoing court battles over my sons' passport. I got three court orders approving the holiday and for the passport to be handed over. Each order was breached. And the courts did nothing to enforce it. Watching your child miss out on a holiday abroad because of their own parent and a flawed 'justice system' is a pain I wouldn’t wish on anyone. More applications just fighting for what I know is right and fair! Add to that, 13 years of post-separation abuse, financial abuse through withheld child maintenance, and the pressure of keeping everything going 'as normal', and it takes a toll.

When “coping” stops working

From the outside, I looked like I was coping. I showed up every morning. Ran my businesses. Supported my clients. Held everything together for my kids. Inside, I was exhausted. Numb. Disconnected from myself. I'd spent the last four years constantly feeling tired, no matter how much I slept or the changes I made to my day-to-day routine.

Blood tests showed nothing obvious. But I knew something wasn’t right. I even said to my partner, if it's not my thyroid then maybe I'm depressed.

Saying it out loud to my GP in May this year broke me yet relieved me at the same time. I sat there and said, “I think I’m depressed,” and the tears came fast and hard. She asked why the tears, and there was so much shame... I even said, “I feel like I should be coping better than I am.” That sentence alone says everything about how many women live... Strong on the outside whilst drowning quietly on the inside.

What 14 years of constant stress really does to you

Post-separation abuse is often worse than the abuse that takes place during the relationship itself. Add post-lockdown stress. Add people you trusted taking advantage of you in business. Add peri-menopause. Add the constant pressure to be resilient, capable, and grateful. It chips away at you slowly until one day you realise you’ve drifted a long way from who you are at your core.

The decision that changed everything

I didn’t make a dramatic decision. I didn’t suddenly feel confident or strong. I made an honest one. I got help. I started a short course of sertraline. I got support with my businesses. I stopped pretending I could do everything alone. And in doing that, I found my way back to myself. Back to why I do this work. Back to helping women talk honestly about how they feel. Back to supporting them through stress, burnout, low self-worth, and the silent struggles no one sees.

Why I know this matters

Every single woman I’ve worked with this year reached the same point: “I can’t keep doing this on my own.” "I just want to be happy." And when they said it out loud, something shifted. Not overnight and not in perfect order. But enough to start choosing themselves. That’s why I do what I do. Not to fix women but to help them stop abandoning themselves.

What I’m choosing for the year ahead

2026 isn’t about a “new me.” It’s about having clear intentions. I won’t stay silent to keep the peace. I won’t tolerate people who refuse to take accountability. I won’t ignore my needs to make others comfortable. I will keep helping women cut through self-hate, speak honestly, and build lives that actually feel like theirs.

Taking the First Step Towards Healing

If this resonates with you, I want you to know that change is possible. You don’t need more motivation. You don’t need to wait for January 1st. You don’t need to cope better. You need one honest decision. And support while you learn how to live it.

It’s time to reclaim your life. It’s time to embrace the journey of healing. You deserve to feel whole again. You deserve to be happy. Remember, you’re not alone in this. Together, we can navigate the path to a brighter future.

A Call to Action

If you’re ready to take that step, I encourage you to reach out. Whether it’s through coaching, support groups, or simply talking to someone who understands, you don’t have to face this alone. Let’s work together to transform your relationship with yourself and empower you to live a happier, healthier life.

Dee xx